Ssion - holding God up for ransom just to get you all dancing.

Ssion (pronounced "shun", as in "session" without the "se") are great looking. Like they've been hired for the wedding of John Waters and Larry Levan. Or to run the door at a gay club in Interzone. The frontman looks like a Moroccan street punk werewolf, while their leading lady looks like she runs an S&M cubicle in an open plan accountant's office.

The music is predictably ludicrous, and some tracks like "Bullshit" and "Street Jizz" are just bad American electroclash, that go for provocative but end up numbing. But when they let a bit of sunshine in, they transform.

"Heaven" is like being bombarded with Pick'n'Mix fired from a giant cock-shaped cannon. It's camp, silly, and you won't like it if you don't have a sweet tooth, but it'll probably make you smile and flail around like a dancing 5-year-old.

Ssion - Heaven

My love for Glass Candy is extremely strong, and while their remix of "Clown" has their usual irresistable icy sass, I think the original has the edge. I'm a sucker for a Chic-like one note rhythm guitar and middle-8's full of demented laughter.

Ssion - Clown